DRAWING CHRISTINA THE CAT!
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ASK Christina the Cat!
New advice column!
Dear Mittsy,
I'm sure he's very nice, but sometimes nice just isn't enough.
Personally, when I meet a new neighbor, I let them come to me, provided they venture toward my territory slowly while begging for my consent.
Only a fool gets in my face too quick, and better watch out, my reflexes are quick as lightning.
I'll sometimes initiate with a little side-swipe then let them down gently, but that's just me.
Here's the NUMBER ONE best way to attract him...ABSOLUTELY IGNORE him.
Trust me on this, it really is the best way to break the nice, I mean the ice.
You're welcome very much,
Christina
Dear Christina,
There's a male calico who moved in next door and I'm attracted to him..what can I do to get his attention?-Mittsy
Dear Christina,
Hi! I'm a huge fan, and agree with every single piece of advice you give! My co-worker wears a tuna fragrance perfume
that smells so good, it stimulates my appetite, so I end up eating all my lunch by 9 am, then I starve all day..should I tell her to stop wearing it to work?- Plumpstuff
ASK Christina the Cat!
Dear Christina,
Just wondering how in the world do
you stay so slim? Someone told me you must've had liposuction...if so, did it hurt?-Whiskerina
Dear Whisk,
Darling, you've just made my whole month, the best compliment from a fan I've ever received, other than the time I was told I had the glossiest coat on Earth. You know you can trust me to never tell, but WHO thought I'd had lipo??
No procedures yet, it's my vegetarian diet, (a little salmon, so I'm actually a pescatarian).
NO snacks, not even a saucer of nonfat milk after 2 pm. You'll be surprised to hear I don't believe in exercise, but I have a top quality scratching post that sharpens my claws beautifully, so I stretch alot.
Love to you,
Christina
Dear Plump,
Thanks so much for enjoying my column! If everyone just listens to me, they'd all be smart kitties just like you!
Yes, I would be honest and tell her to lay off fragrances that smell so delectable you can't pay attention to your work.
If she doesn't, explain to her that it's all her fault that your cutest catsuit doesn't fit anymore.
Personally, I think it's rude, and if she does it again, sneak into the fridge, steal her lunch and eat it quickly...remember what I always say, calories don't count if no one sees you eating!
Good luck Chunks, I mean Plump,
Christina
